The Life and Legacy of Norm Wright

The Life and Legacy of Norm Wright

Categories: AACC BLOG

by Dr. Gary Oliver

On July 25, 1937, H. Norman Wright was born in Hollywood Hills, California. He grew up attending Hollywood Hills Presbyterian Church and went to Hollywood High School. For several decades, he was a professor at Biola University and Talbot Seminary. In addition, he taught at many other universities and seminaries.

Norm was a true pioneer in teaching, training, and writing about biblically-based and research-supported aspects of relationships. His body of work includes writings on premarital counseling, communication in marriage, marriage and family counseling, conflict management, emotions, parenting, crisis response, grief and trauma, and so much more.

He was one of the most uniquely gifted and prolific men of his generation. Norm wrote more than 100 books, selling millions of copies. From his first book in 1968 to his last published in 2021, his teachings were based on his study of God’s Word, thorough research, personal experiences, and, most importantly, what he learned from his clients. He was a uniquely honest, vulnerable, and faithful servant who loved to talk but was an even better listener. Despite Norm’s accomplishments, he was humble and always gave others credit where credit was due.

Norm gave countless seminars and workshops on various thoroughly researched topics. In recent years, he felt God calling him to focus most of his professional teaching, writing, and ministry on grief, loss, crisis, and trauma. While he trained tens of thousands of people, the work was NEVER about building his kingdom or fan club but always about serving his Lord by serving others.

Norm gave countless seminars and workshops on various thoroughly researched topics. In recent years, he felt God calling him to focus most of his professional teaching, writing, and ministry on grief, loss, crisis, and trauma. While he trained tens of thousands of people, the work was NEVER about building his kingdom or fan club but always about serving his Lord by serving others.

Norm and I met in 1968 when I was a camp counselor at Forest Home Christian Conference Center in Southern California, where he presented his first book, Help… I’m a Camp Counselor. When I took one of his classes at Talbot Seminary, we discovered that he and his first wife, Joyce, lived just a few miles from where I grew up in Long Beach. He invited me over, and that began a friendship of more than 50 years. For decades, we talked several times each month, encouraging, updating, informing, and laughing at and with one another. Our calls often ended with, “I love you.”

Although Norm faced many personal tragedies in life, he practiced what he taught throughout his losses. He truly trusted God. His first wife, Joyce, died just two months after my first wife, Carrie, passed. For the next six months, we talked almost daily. We listened and were silent. We cried and laughed and cried some more. We gave thanks for our lives, our work, and our friendship. Out of his losses came some of his most valuable resources.

Norm was open about his strengths and weaknesses. He embraced his successes and failures, was not argumentative, and had no desire to correct anyone who disagreed with him—never needing to force his view to be correct but always wanting to ensure you knew he cared. He never made those around him feel like they “were in the presence of royalty” because of what he had accomplished, although I always knew I was in the presence of a great man.

A loyal, affectionate, and faithful friend to many, Norm was a uniquely gifted and effective teacher who deeply cared about those he taught. He chose to be a man that God could trust, someone who practiced what he preached… and passed the same way he lived, as a faithful follower of His Lord Jesus Christ.

One of Norm’s favorite passages was James 1:2-3 (NLT): “… when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow.” Norm didn’t just teach it; he actually practiced it and became a living example to millions. And as he would often say, “To God be the glory!”

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Dr. Gary Oliver is a psychologist and author. He currently serves as the director emeritus of the Center for Healthy Relationships. He is also a professor of psychology and practical theology at John Brown University in Siloam Springs, Arkansas. He received his B.A. from Biola University, an M.Div. from Talbot Theological Seminary, a Th.M. from Fuller Theological Seminary, and an M.A. and a Ph.D. in psychology from the University of Nebraska in Lincoln. Dr. Oliver has over 40 years’ experience in individual, premarital, marital and family counseling. He also serves on the executive board and the national speaking team of the American Association of Christian Counselors. Dr. Oliver is the author or co-author of over 20 books including, Mad About Us: Moving from Anger to Intimacy with Your Spouse, Raising Sons and Loving It, Made Perfect in Weakness, and Real Men Have Feelings Too. Dr. Gary Oliver resides in Arkansas with his wife and family.