Make Your
Life Count:

You see, there’s something fierce in the heart of every man… something that fuels a deep level of competitiveness that pushes us to plow past our limits and drives us to persevere no matter the cost. Men want to step up. Men want to step in. Men want to succeed. I have never met a man who dreamt of “sitting on the bench” in life. Every man dreams of slaying the giant, rushing into the burning house, belting the walk-off grand slam, stepping down the lunar module’s ladder onto the moon’s surface, or being at the bottom of the celebratory championship dog pile. Although many men may settle for average, I have never met one who dreamt of it.²

However, in my work as a counselor and coach in the mental health space, I have quickly become aware that this internal drive for greatness meant to inspire us can sadly imprison us as well. If we aren’t careful and do not have our priorities, perspective, and purpose in order, our competitive nature can become a comparison trap. The habits and ways of men are often rooted in “what I do” and “what others think of me.” While I believe effective ministry to men considers motivators and elements deeply rooted or connected to performance and motivation as men serve out their roles of protector, provider, and more, I also believe we must help men remember where their identities are ultimately found. Too often, men get lost in equating what we do with who we are, and in our never-ending pursuit to pad our resumes and puff up our reputations, we sometimes wind up sacrificing what truly matters—our relationships, integrity, and legacy along the way.

Yet, I am reminded of a particular passage in Scripture located in Matthew 3:16-17 (NIV) where Christ, the Son of God, was being baptized. It says, “As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting on him. And a voice from heaven said, ‘This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.’”

This passage has always struck me because up to this point, Jesus had not turned water into wine, walked on water, healed the sick, or made blind eyes see. He had not performed any miracles but had remained persistent in His mission. He was not flashy… He was faithful. I believe Jesus understood something that many of us have difficulty grasping—that God’s love for us is not contingent upon what we do or do not do. He doesn’t even love us because of who we are—God loves us because of who He is (1 John 4:8). For this reason, I believe with confidence that Romans 8:38-39 reminds us that there is nothing we could do that would make God love us any less or any more than He already does. Therefore, our goal in this life should not be to earn His love but to steward what He has already given.

Living Life on Mission

One of the best ways I believe we can honor the Lord and allow Him to look down with pleasure in His heart toward us is through living a life on mission. Years ago, I will never forget watching the movie Saving Private Ryan, which depicts the journey of eight American soldiers who were dispatched to “save” Private James Francis Ryan during World War II.

The background to the story is that all three of James’ brothers had been killed in combat, so in an attempt to prevent his mother from losing all of her sons in battle, the Army determined they were going to bring her only surviving son home safely. However, during this rescue mission, many lives were lost, ultimately leading to the death of the revered Captain John Miller. Then, at the end of the movie, there is a scene forever etched in my mind where a much older Private Ryan, accompanied by his wife, visits the gravesite of Captain Miller, and he asks the question so many men wonder, “Have I led a good life?” In essence, did I earn the sacrifice that was made for me?

I want to leave you with three simple challenges that I believe can help us all live a life worthy of the call:

1. Stay Focused. Philippians 3:13 (NLT) says, “No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead….” Do not allow the distractions of this world to deter you from the mission God has you on or the momentum you have created.

2. Keep Fighting. 1 Timothy 6:12 (NIV) says, “Fight the good fight of the faith….” No matter how dark, difficult, or discouraging life may be, remember you are never out of the fight, and if God still allows breath in your lungs, He still has an incredible plan and purpose for your life. Prepare, compete, and never give up!

3. Remain Faithful. 1 Corinthians 4:2 (ESV) says, “Moreover, it is required of stewards that they be found faithful.” Remember, this life is not about being first; it is about being faithful! When our time here on earth ends, our goal is not to hear God say, “Well done, my good and famous or important husband, father, pastor, business owner, coach, counselor, etc.” Our goal is to hear Him say, “Well done, good and faithful servant…” (Matthew 25:23).

If you can do these things, when your time comes, I believe you can be sure in your heart that you, too, have lived a purposeful, meaningful, and missional life. Remember, you are loved, you matter, and you are the son God looks at with love and pleasure in His heart. So, let us forever seek to know Him more and to make His name known! ?

Endnotes

1. Scott, R. (2000). Gladiator. DreamWorks Distribution. ?

2. Clinton, Z., & Davis, M. (2024). Even if: Developing the faith, mindset, strength, and endurance of those who are built different. AACC Publishing. ?